After a very rough weekend of Amelia illness, 2-year molar teething (again!), and a 3-day hunger strike, I was thrilled to hear Amelia begin her day with chatter and giggles instead of tears. She ate breakfast and went to school happy. At school, she played on the playground, worked on some art, entertained her teachers with some dance moves, and ate all of her lunch. I thought I could not be happier with her positive turnaround since our nightmare of a weekend.
I was wrong. I could be happier... Amelia treated me to an extra-special mommy/daughter moment today. She filled my heart with joy.
Amelia wanted me to rock her to sleep at naptime.
I have not been able to rock my active, precocious girl to sleep in over a year. So when she demanded that I cuddle with her in the rocking chair and listen to music, I did it. We didn't talk. We didn't sing. We just sat together, her head on my shoulder, and rocked.
I feel the pull of my various responsibilities constantly. The working mom in me always wonders what's in my email inbox. The "perfect" mom in me is always worried about something - is she potty training fast enough, is she going to stop pushing other kids at school, is she hyperactive? Way too often, it is the happy mom who gets left behind. I'm a multi-tasker. I can check email while I watch the mac-n-cheese cooking on the stove and clap for Amelia after she sings me a song. I don't often let myself stop and truly immerse myself in a moment. There is always something else to be done.
Today, for 15 minutes, everything stopped. Thoughts of work left my brain. The pull of my email, my blog, and Facebook did not exist. The ongoing internal debate over when to take away Amelia's sleeping pacifier ceased. Amelia and I enjoyed our moment together.
And I was, 100%, without a doubt, happy.
If you have an infant and you're struggling with sleep deprivation, try to take a second and find the joy. Because too quickly, you won't be rocking that little one to sleep anymore. Unless one day they surprise you.
Today, I was happily surprised.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
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