Tuesday, July 26, 2011

I wonder if she knew?

I wonder now if she knew. If, perhaps, my OB-GYN had a suspicion of what was to come.

A week prior to my due date, we began to discuss a day of delivery. I had some complications and rising blood pressure, but nothing too drastic. I probably could have waited for labor to begin naturally. But she insisted on scheduling a date and time.

She insisted that we plan a delivery for April 8th. Not one day past my original due date.

She asked – more than once – if I wanted to opt for a C-section. She had two C-sections herself. She was more than happy to schedule one for me too.

I was one month shy of 30 years old. I had only gained 30 pounds of pregnancy weight. I was decently healthy and not overweight.

This was my first pregnancy. I feared the complications of surgery. I opted for an epidural-supported vaginal delivery.

She asked me a couple days prior. Was I sure I did not want a C-section?

Nope. I was going to do this “right”.

We scheduled the induction process to begin the night before my due date. Nothing happened.

The following morning, we waited. And waited some more. Nothing happened.

By noon, they broke my water. Things began to progress. But the pitocin-powered fast deliveries featured in others’ birth stories? Not at all what happened to me.

Finally, after hours of pushing, after my face & head felt like they were going to explode from stress, after utter exhaustion set in, a nurse midwife asked the big question.

“Did anyone tell you this baby is large?”

Um, what?!?

I still wonder if she knew. Was my kind doctor really just a fan of the C-section delivery? Or did she know my baby girl would be born at 9 pounds and nearly 22 inches long?

I did not want to listen. I wanted to be all-powerful. I feared the thought of surgery.

Maybe next time I should ask more questions. Or listen to her advice.

Lesson learned.

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This week's RemembeRED prompt from The Red Dress Club: Write a post that either starts or ends with the words "Lesson learned." Word limit: 400 words.


comingeast.com said...Best Blogger Tips

Ouch! That's almost twice my first baby (she was only 5 pounds, ten ounces, but I guess you don't want to hear that!) Nicely written.

Amber Page Writes said...Best Blogger Tips

I had to have a C-section, and let me tell you recover wasn't fun! Probably better than what you went through, though.

Galit Breen said...Best Blogger Tips

I *love* birth stories! And I love the question that you posed about your doctor, and your transparency about wanting to do things "right." We are so very hard on ourselves sometimes, aren't we?

letmestartbysaying said...Best Blogger Tips

Holy shmo! That's a big girl. Did you end up going vaginal, or taking the C? You've left me hanging!
Came from TRDC linkup...

BalancingMama (Julie) said...Best Blogger Tips

Oh, no C-section. I did it, with the help of the midwife's scissors and an episiotomy - ouch.

Emily said...Best Blogger Tips

Oh, yes! Skinny girl, nine pound baby -- I hear you! Yikes! And ouch! (And she was a beautiful baby!)

Elaine A. said...Best Blogger Tips

But you did it, right? It's a tough call. I'm just surprised your doctor never actually said anything to you about thinking the baby as big...

Jackie said...Best Blogger Tips

My OB dubbed baby one "the moose", but I attempted to "do it the right way" too. She ended up only being 8 lbs, but didn't tolerate labor. I learned my lesson though, and had the repeat c with Daughter 2.

angela said...Best Blogger Tips

But you did it! I ended up with 2 emergency c-sections (the second I tried and failed to VBAC), and I always wonder "what if?" (though not so much about my second).

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