Monday, March 21, 2011

So afraid

Sometimes I feel paralyzed with fear. With every tantrum, every expression of anger, every meltdown I see from my child, I worry. I worry that she is not normal. That she is somehow more angry than other 3-year olds in this world. I am terrified that I am not raising her right. That I am going to create a little monster who ends up to be a teenage terror.

I am afraid of her tantrums. Timeout is a punishment for me as much as it is for her - my heart races, my stress level goes through the roof. I cannot stand forcing her into her room, then running to close the gate before she prys herself free. The sound of her screaming and calling "mommy! mooooommy!" really hurts.

More than anything in this world, I want a well-adjusted, happy child. I know she will act up at times. I know she's in a stage where the world completely revolves around her wishes. But I can't stop the fear. Is she worse than other kids her age? Am I doing something totally wrong? My mommy confidence is in tatters.

I try to find that fine line between respecting her wishes and standing my ground as THE MOM. I know I need to be more consistent with her punishments. I have to change myself before I can help her leap the hurdle of this age. That's what Nanny 911 is all about, right? She never changes the kids - she changes the parenting.

We conquered the terrible twos a few months ago. It sounds like threes are going to be just as challenging.

Wish us luck (and thanks for sticking through this rambling post).


Mom to 2 Posh Lil Divas said...Best Blogger Tips

Love this post! You are not alone - those same thoughts run through my head as well. I do have to say I found age 3 worse than age 2. They are more aware, trying to be more independent & definitely much more selfish. It too shall pass! You sound like you are doing the right thing. Continue to be consistent & yes, it is exhausting but she will eventually realize you mean business. Good luck & know you are doing a great job & she is normal & all will be well!


Melissa said...Best Blogger Tips

You are so not alone. While I was very fortunate and had 2 very well behaved 2 & 3 yr old children, that changed drastically when my daughter hit the teenage years (which by the way I'm still suffering through) and when my son turned 6ish (he is now 12 and much better). I think each child is different. Each parent has a different parenting style and they stand firm in their beliefs. I believe in tough love, I believe in ignoring a screaming child, that doesn't mean others don't.
Good luck on what ever route you choose to take!

Linds said...Best Blogger Tips

Good Moms worry. The moms that don't worry are normally the ones with the screaming terrors. If you are worrying, you are doing something right!

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