Thankful Thursday

Lately, I represent a dazzling mix of confusing and conflicting emotions.

I've been feeling crowded... yet lonely.
Frazzled... but bored.
Proud... and disappointed at the same time.

The rest of the world glances at the upheaval we're experiencing, offers a quick smile, maybe a word of encouragement, and then retreats back to petty concerns and narcissism. But we're in it. Deep. Through thick & thin. Banding together as a family until life becomes normal again. With a 28-month old diva on the side, just to add that extra level of difficulty.

But you know what? I have SO MUCH for which I am truly thankful. Therefore, it is time to hit "pause" on the drama and take a moment for Thankful Thursday.

TODAY I AM THANKFUL FOR FAMILY.

For...

- My sister-in-law. For her perseverance and determination.

- My daughter. For her intelligence and sense of humor.

- My husband. For his dedication to his family, despite never-ending career pressures.

- My parents. Because I always know they will come to my aid.

- My sister. For never letting me forget how much Amelia is loved by others.

- My in-laws. For showing what a family will do when the going gets tough.

- ME. For my health, heart, and home.


"In a time of test, family is best."
(Burmese proverb)


Have a great - and thankful - day!

Wordless (almost) Wednesday

One year ago, Hilton Head beach trip. It took Amelia less than 5 minutes to find her special surprise in Grandma and Granddad's bags. The joy on her face was priceless! Luckily, I had a camera in hand at the right moment.

Beach trip coming up again soon! I cannot wait for some lazy days on the sand listening to the waves crash on the shore. Maybe a sandcastle or two with my hubby and my girl.

I wonder what surprise Amelia will find in her grandparents' luggage this time?

Give me a D! Give me an R!

Give me a D-R-A-M-A! What's that spell?

DRAMA! Gooooo (away) drama!

Wouldn't life be more fun it is was simple?

D is for decision. It used to be fun deciding what Amelia would wear each day. No longer a simple task. This child fights everything! When I ask her to choose, she merely throws everything out of the drawer. Can I send her to school in PJs every day?

R is for reaction. How do I not react to all the insanity going on around me? Adults acting like children. A child acting out for attention. If only I could be calm, cool, and collected through all of this. Silly me has to get - involved.

A is for attention. The attention my child wants. The attention I occasionally I can't give. She knows the phrase "Mommy is working" a little too well. Lately she's been bringing her little pink toy computer over to the table. Plunking herself down beside me and saying, "Now Amelia is working too." Heart... melting!

M is for motion. My little family of three is always in motion. Amelia is nearly 2-1/2 years old. She never stops moving! I struggle every day to stop myself from moving. I feel guilt when I sit still. There are always dishes to be done, Or vacuuming. Or laundry. Or work. Steve is either driving to work or to a meeting. Or his hands are type, type, typing in response to 100+ emails he receives each day. We're on a carousel that never stops. And it doesn't even have pretty horses.

A is for acceleration. The feeling of my heart inside my chest. I'm stressed. I want to fix my SIL's pain. I want to console everyone else who has worry in their hearts. I want to better understand my daughter's tantrums so I can stop letting them get to me. I want to go to a 5-star hotel. With a spa. And a view of the ocean.

D-R-A-M-A!
Drama, drama, go away!

Blog-hopping on Monday

Finally, a good night's sleep! Thanks, Advil PM. And thanks to Amelia, who stayed in her room all night and didn't make a peep. She didn't wake until 9:00 a.m.!

So I'm feeling pretty good.

Now it's naptime, and we're doing out new naptime in Mommy's room routine. I love the forced quiet time. I got some work done, read part of a book, and now I'm checking out some newly-discovered blogs.

It's a blog hop! I added 3MomsInOne to the following:

One here too!

Happy Monday, everyone!

Shhh... hear that?

Silence.

I love watching her sleep. Her sweet little round face is calm. The long eyelashes on her closed eyes are lovely. We're resting together in my room - our new favorite naptime spot. I listen to nothing but the sound of her gentle breathing. The phone is unplugged. My cell is on vibrate. I am forced to spend time in silence.

I like it.

Jeepers Creepers

"Jeepers Creepers, where'd ya get those peepers?

Jeepers Creepers, where'd ya get those eyes?"

(Lyrics from the 1938 film "Going Places")

I owe my thanks once again to MamaKat for making it easy on me. Once again, I was going to skip my post today. Then I realized it's a Thursday - the day to link up to Mama Kat's Writing Workshop.

Lucky for me, one of the prompts was a cinch:

The most unbelievable blue eyes you’ve ever seen…

Easy, easy, easy! My feisty little princess has the most unbelievable blue eyes I've ever seen. We melt whenever she stares at us with those round baby blues. And boy, does she know how to work those eyes already! We're in for trouble.

We figured her eyes would turn brown during her first year of life. I have very brown eyes. My husband has brownish-green eyes. Never did we imagine Amelia's gorgeous blues would stick. But they did!

If I remember my basic high school genetics lesson correctly, Amelia had a 25% chance of getting blue eyes. My parents have brown (Dad) and blue (Mom). This makes me a Bb. Steve's parents have brown (Mom) and blue (Dad), also making him a Bb. Whenever the dominant "big B" (brown) is in the mix, the eyes will be brown. So... the possible combinations of two Bb's are:

BB - brown

Bb - brown

Bb - brown

bb - Blue!!!!

Lucky girl.

Crazy man

I have been married for 7-1/2 years to a wonderful husband - and friend. He is helpful around the house, understands (and tolerates!) my quirks, and truly adores his little girl. I know a few people who don't have that kind of support at home. And it's heartbreaking.

These days, however, Steve and I consider ourselves lucky if we manage to watch one TV show together in the evening. More often than not, he barely gets Amelia to bed before booting up the computer and getting back to work. Or I'm so worn down that I just want to curl up in bed with my latest ebook on the Nook. We both know that the craziness is temporary. We're both striving to find some sanity again. And in the meantime, I've learned how that little spark of love can show up in the strangest ways.

We were coming home from the rehab hospital, three kiddos in the back seat, laughing and singing children's songs. We stopped at Costco for some gasoline. That's when I heard some Amelia giggles. There was my husband, peering in the backseat window while pumping the gasoline. Making ridiculous faces at the kids. Really silly ones... not lazy just-stick-his-tongue-out kind of faces, but full-on wacky contortions of every possible facial muscle. The kids thought this was hilarious. Amelia's laugh was priceless.

And at that moment, laughing along with the kids, it struck me just how much I love this guy.

Crossed eyes, puffy cheeks, and buck teeth.... who knew?